Gerry Canavan

the smartest kid on earth

Monday Morning

with 3 comments

* Nemesis watch: Professor claims NYU fired him after he gave James Franco a ‘D.’

José Angel Santana said he slapped the “127 Hours’’ star with the bad grade because he missed 12 of his 14 “Directing the Actor II” classes while pursuing a master’s in fine arts.

Santana said he then suffered all kinds of drama — first from Franco, who publicly ridiculed him, then from his department, which axed him over the “D.”

“The school has bent over backwards to create a Franco-friendly environment, that’s for sure,” Santana, 58, told The Post. “The university has done everything in its power to curry favor with James Franco.”

It’s almost enough to make you doubt a person can be a successful professional actor while simultaneously attending four separate graduate programs and succeeding at all of them.

* Via Facebook: College bowl system loots universities. Today’s case study: the University of Minnesota.

The bloodbath began the moment the contract was signed. Minnesota was obligated to write a check for 10,000 tickets, which were supposed to be resold to fans. Never mind that even the best of teams struggle to unload such sums. For middling squads like the Gophers, it was nothing more than a way for the men in funny yellow blazers who ran the Insight to grab piles of money from a public university.

Minnesota managed to sell just 901 seats. After kicking another 900 to the band, administrators, and cherished hangers-on, the school was forced to eat $476,000 worth of useless tickets.

The contract also required the team to show up a week early, if only to burn as much school money as possible at the restaurants and retailers of greater Phoenix.

One would think school administrators would protest such gall. But one would be wrong. They were quick to see the advantages of a luxury vacation on the school’s dime. So they happily signed off.

The school’s traveling party was larded up with 722 people, including players, band members, and faculty. Airfare alone ran $542,000. Toss in hotels and meals, and the school had blown $1.3 million before the opening kickoff.

The ballsiest part of all: None of it was necessary. Minnesota and Iowa State sit less than 200 miles apart. Their teams were providing the game. Their bands supplied the halftime entertainment. In fact, the Insight offered nothing—save for warm weather—that the schools couldn’t have done better themselves.

Had the game been played in Minneapolis, the teams could have sold more tickets and put on a profitable game, since Big 10 matches typically generate $1 to $2 million—not knee-bending losses.

* Kim Jong-Un Privately Doubting He’s Crazy Enough To Run North Korea. At America’s Finest News Source.

* From the New Yorker archives: two letters from North Korea.

* Gerry Canavan Privately Doubting Iowa Republicans Are Really Crazy Enough to Take Ron Paul Seriously.

* And Akim Reinhardt asks: How will we know what Occupy meant once it’s over?

3 Responses

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  1. Re Franco, I haven’t been this disillusioned since Mike Tyson gave a lengthy interview to Sports Illustrated filled with his quotations from a wide range of literary and philosophical sources…and shortly afterward failed the GED.

    Pete

    December 19, 2011 at 11:10 am

  2. Franco should have gotten an F.
    He misses 12 out of 14 classes but still technically passes? What was the attendance policy?

    Franco-phile

    December 19, 2011 at 1:53 pm

    • Must have nailed his final project.

      gerrycanavan

      December 19, 2011 at 2:06 pm


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